Seems there’s a lot of rage happening in our world right now. Many of us are experiencing fury over various injustices, ongoing health concerns, and a general feeling that society is falling apart.
It’s enough to make one scream! And many of us are doing just that—at each other.
The ash left behind
Stress from ongoing cultural circumstances definitely bleeds over into relationships at home and work. And for many of us, these frustrations have been going on for quite a while.
But harboring irritations isn’t something we need to experience on a consistent basis. Besides firing up a bad mood and unkind expressions toward others, there are actually health risks associated with holding to bitterness and rage, according to Better Health Channel:
- digestion problems, such as abdominal pain
- insomnia
- increased anxiety
- depression
- high blood pressure
- skin problems, such as eczema
- heart attack
- stroke
- headaches
Those symptoms aren’t good for any of us!
So, how do you cope when life situations burn you? Does fury quickly flame up and spread toward everyone in your path? Or do you wish to find a way of snuffing it out but you’re unsure how to do it?
Damage control
First, we need to remember there are various circumstances that lead to heated rage. Some sources that exasperate us are far-reaching and completely out of our grasp to fix.
But others hit closer to home, such as those experienced in our personal relationships. These are the ones that we should take time to resolve before too much destruction happens.
When aggravation is toward a person close to us, we need to come to a resolution in order for the relationship to continue growing. The best thing to do is for each person to share what’s on their heart, which may need to come after a short period of cooling down has taken place. But through conversation—even if it’s difficult to discuss—we can usually figure out what the real reason is behind the angry words.
Under the surface
Many hold to the theory that anger is a “secondary emotion” which means it flares up because of other primary feelings such as hurt, frustration, or disappointment. Although we may think we’re “just angry,” other feelings are often lurking underneath where it all started. From looking at this image by The Gottman Institute, it makes sense!
So how can we move away from the heat of resentment to a more peaceful, happy life?
I recently saw some easy tips for releasing ones’ anger while reading Healthline.com. To combat feelings of bitterness, it was suggested we try taking slow, controlled breaths inhaled from our bellies instead of our chests. This allows the body to instantly calm itself. A few detailed guidelines for this approach were to:
- Find a chair or place where you can comfortably sit, allowing your neck and shoulders to fully relax.
- Breathe deeply through your nose and pay attention to your tummy rising.
- Exhale through your mouth.
- Try doing this exercise 3 times a day for 5 to 10 minutes or as needed.
Some tried and true methods for moving past anger:
Exercise—as simple as going for quiet walks outdoors
Distractions—watching a light-hearted TV show or movie
Self-care—doing things that bring calm to your body and mindset
Reading—magazines, books, and Scripture help re-set our thinking to a more positive vibe
Friendships—find someone you can share your feelings with to help process your thoughts
One of the most effective things we can do if we’re having hostile thoughts and feelings toward another person is to pray about the situation. We read in Colossians 3:15 a great reminder, “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts.” God knows what’s going on in our thoughts as well as the difficult circumstances in our relationships. The Lord can help us deal with hurtful situations that feel out of our control.
If you’re having problems dealing with anger, don’t allow that mindset to fester and get the best of you. Find a way of managing those feelings for your own good and the relationships in your life.