If you’re feeling a little testy, short-tempered, and “crabby” these days, you’re not alone. I’ve been feeling it as well.
Most friends and people who know me well would probably say I’m fairly mild-mannered, slow to anger, drawn toward reasonable conversations, and admire rational discussions even if I disagree with another person’s position. However, as 2020 has moved along, I have found myself to be a bit snippy.
The year started like all previous years with anticipation of the future, the expectation of time with family and friends, vacations planned, airline tickets purchased, and accommodations rented. But then March came and turned our normal year into the craziest one ever!
An April trip got canceled. I must admit, although an abrupt halt to plans and activity, that first month’s forced slow-down seemed a welcome respite. It was a break from everything hectic, and a chance to stay home. Whew!
As the semi-shutdown has moved into the summer and now fall months, as the coronavirus continues to attack our world, as our political life becomes more partisan divided, and our communities become less inviting behind masks, I find that I’m still not my usual self but rather more irritable. There may be a limit to a human’s resilience and ability to maintain balance when the world around us seems unbalanced with no definite end in sight.
If you have more angry moments and not feeling yourself, there’s a reason for it. According to the American Psychiatric Association, “More than one-third of Americans (36%) say coronavirus is having a serious impact on their mental health and most (59%) feel coronavirus is having a serious impact on their day-to-day lives.” What can we do about this increased tension, anger, or “snippy” mindset that has masked our current mode of operation?
10 Steps to Reducing Anger and Increasing Resilience:
- Get good sleep. I’ve found if I get good sleep, I can almost always handle my next day.
- Exercise outside if possible. A walk after dinner can be restorative.
- Make a list of what needs to get done. Forgetfulness is common during stressful periods.
- Play the games you enjoy. Simple games like jigsaw puzzles, checkers, or sudoku. We play bingo online with our kids in New Zealand.
- Learn to notice, catch your anger, and then take constructive action to reel it back in.
- Notice when you need to take a break from friends and family. Distance yourself for a time in order to calm emotions.
- Call a trusted safe friend to talk about your feelings.
- Slow your breathing. Inhale, and then exhale slowly. Many doctors and mental health professionals, including Dr. Daniel Amen, suggest slow diaphragmic breathing for 10-15 minutes is good for your brain and your general mood.
- “Circle back” with friends or family when your reactions have been a bit “snippy” earlier. Find a time to re-gather with them when your emotions are more settled, and your thoughts are more collected and reliably calm.
- Schedule an appointment with a professional mental health clinician
If your anger is starting to significantly affect your life (i.e. panic attacks, increased alcohol and drug use, abuse, depression, anxiety, self-harming thoughts or feelings)
My hope is that at the end of this year we can all look back with gratitude for the provision of God our Father who has never changed and is a constant source of peace in which we can fully trust.